


Whole at the Start

by ToukoTai



Category: Red vs. Blue
Genre: Gen, Multi, Romance I guess, Soulmate-Identifying Timers, With A Twist, polyamory is always the answer
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-05
Updated: 2017-09-10
Packaged: 2018-04-13 01:07:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,167
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4501935
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ToukoTai/pseuds/ToukoTai
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In a world of soulmates and timers and finding your other half, Washington is part of the five percent of the population to have no timer.<br/>And therefore, no soulmate.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I've always liked non standard soulmate AU's.

The way Washington sees it, it’s everyone else who’s missing out. Not him. Everyone else is wrapped up in countdowns, in seconds, in living from one tick of the clock to the next. So fixated on romance, on fate, on  _this is how it’s meant to be_ , on being so goddamn _dramatic_ all the _fucking time_.

To him, a day is a day is a day. It's twenty four hours long and it's filled any way he wants. It's not one day closer to anything, to a meeting or to an ending. It's not waiting, it's not lived in the confines of 'I only have so much time left'. A day is a day to David just-call-me-Washington Washington. His life is his own. And no one else's.

At this point, he’s not even sure what he would do, if the numbers suddenly showed up one day. Probably laugh. Probably cry. Certainly both at the same time. He’s fine with being the one in a million without a countdown to love or whatever.

He’s used to it. At this point. He’s used to people sending him pitying looks when they find out, used to being talked about in hushed whispers. Used to his friends clinging way tighter to him, crowding his space, because _poor guy, he doesn’t have another half_.

Well, fuck them. The way Washington sees it, everyone else is a little too obsessed with what he doesn’t have, that they forget what he does.

Washington has freedom. Has free will.

There is no countdown for him, there’s no preordained path he has to follow whether he wants to or not. He is his own person, shaped by his own choices, made without consulting a set of digits on his arm. Washington doesn’t have to live with the anxiety of a countdown going down, doesn't have to live with the fear of having a bad match. Of praying that the numbers don’t grey out or freeze. Wondering, wishing, dreaming. He lives his life outside the constraints of a future meeting with a soul mate.

He lives his life outside the constraints of a soul mate, _period_.

Washington can be as selfish as he wants. He doesn’t have to consider any other person when making decisions for his future. For what degree he wants, for what school he should go to, for what job he gets. There is really only himself he has to plan for.

If he happens to meet someone, not likely, BUT IF HE DOES, it still won’t be the same. Everyone has a sense of permanence to them. They follow their countdowns, they meet their other half, they stay with that half through thick and thin and everywhere in between. Washington supposes it’s romantic from a certain angle. From his angle…it’s a far cry. Sure there are a majority of really amazing relationships. But abusers still abuse, lairs still lie, cheaters still cheat.(sometimes a person can't help themselves and sometimes they just don't care.) And there’s no escape. Once soul mates meet, they’re never apart for long. Washington couldn’t imagine it. Not being able to cut and run if a relationship turned bad. (Because you can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make it drink.)

He’s dated five other people(all with countdowns) by the time he graduates college. He loved them all, in his own way but they all knew it wasn’t going to last. He was just, training wheels, practice for the main event. And he knew that, but if nothing else, he wanted to see what it felt like. He couldn’t stop himself from being jealous and bitter when the relationship got broken off. Always getting some variation of _it’s not you, it’s me_.

Now he’s out of college, grown out of that phase. He can hang out with CT without wanting to scream, he can listen to York and Carolina’s chatter to each other and not feel the angry spike of resentment. He thinks it’s why Maine calls him, at least once a day, even though all he can do is growl down the receiver at Washington. (The last break hurt the most.)

The new thing he’s running into, now that he’s done with dating, are the people with the greyed out numbers. With dead soul mates, one’s they’ve never met, or maybe they had, once. Trying to find some sense of self in a world that says you need another person to be whole. They’re desperate and floundering. And they zero in on him, because _surely_ the guy without a soulmate wouldn’t say no to the next best thing. Washington would and he did, many times, to many different people and the last time North had to get involved. They’d gotten kicked out of that bar.

Washington has had to fight hard for his peace of self. But he’s found it, uses it to anchor himself in a world that tells him, he will always be less.

Bullshit. He will always be _more_. He doesn’t need another person to complete himself. He came into this world complete. Not needing a second half. His actions are his own, not something that can be blamed on a soulmate.

_I was just so worried_

_Hasn’t spoken to me in **days**_

_I’m sorry officer, but my countdown was almost up._

There is no one obligated to care for or about him but him. He is in charge of himself. He has no obligation to care for or about someone else. Soulmate clauses mean nothing to him. Everything he is, everything he can or will be, is achievable on his own. There is no limbo, no waiting game, no searching for a second or third or even fourth person. It’s go time right now, all the time. His life is always in motion, has always been in motion.

The thing about not having a countdown though, is that Washington has no warning.

He’s at a party, on top of Carolina and York’s apartment building, sitting with his legs dangling over the edge and his arms pillowed on the railing. Watching the sun go down, behind him the white noise of the party. And then CT plops down next to him, she smiles at him when he tilts his head to look at her with a raised eyebrow.

She leans forward and kisses him. No warning, nothing, just goes and does it. Totally slips him tongue too, and not slip so much as assault his mouth with her tongue. Holy shit, he forgot how much he liked kissing CT. And then there’s a low growling coming from his other side as Maine sits down and Washington has to pull himself away from CT to explain ‘no dude, she kissed me first I swear. Please don’t hurt me’(Because you don’t fuck with someone’s soulmate once they’ve found each other.)

But he doesn’t get further then opening his mouth before Maine is kissing him. The drink he was holding slips out of his grip and CT doesn’t even bother trying to catch it, just laughs as there’s a crash from below, the sound of a car alarm and York’s strangled _'My_ ** _baby_** _!“_. Washington isn’t paying attention because holy shit, he forgot how much he liked kissing Maine.

This time, Maine pulls back first, but rests his head against Washington’s.

"What is, just. I am, What?” Washington manages, arms coming up to clutch at Maine’s shirt sleeves. Connie’s arms wind around his waist from behind and her body fits against his back, just like always.

“We had a few talks.” She says into the place between his shoulder blades. “We missed you. Both of us.” Maine rumbles his agreement. “We want to try if you do.” And wow, Maine’s speaking habits must be rubbing off on CT because that was not the explanation Washington had been hoping it would be. But then Washington can’t complain. His response is not much better. Even though he knows this is probably going to be a bad idea, Maine and CT are certified soulmates and Washington is just the guy they both dated once upon a time. But they’re both hanging on him so tightly right now and he can feel Connie’s heart thudding against his back and Maine’s pulse is racing under his thumb. And well, he’s game if they are.

“Kiss me again.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was going through my WIP files and came across this. Which was not a WIP at all.  
> Guess I finished it, then totally and completely forgot about it for two years.  
> Go me!

Maine has a problem. It’s a little complicated. Okay, a lot complicated. The problem is, he’s in love. Has been for a while and it isn’t with his soulmate. 

Well, okay. He  _ is _ in love with his soulmate, he loves Connie from the moment he saw her. She gets him in ways only one other person ever has. He doesn’t need to talk for her to understand him.

The problem is that he doesn’t love  _ only  _ her. He loves Washington too. It’s weird, he loves Connie because in a way he has to, and he’s okay with that. He loves Washington because he chose to. It wasn’t a conscious decision. It wasn’t something he was aware of until too late.

He doesn’t know where to go from here. Because by the time he’s gotten used to being with Connie, to having found her, for the all consuming feeling of being  _ complete _ to abate. It’s been six months since he last talked to or saw Wash and it feels like there’s a blackhole in the fabric of his life. A black hole shaped like Washington.

By the time he realizes that  _ oh shit, I’m in love with Wash _ . It’s six months later and Wash has probably moved on. It’s a situation he can’t even begin to unravel. Complicated on several levels.

Washington did not have a soulmate. Washington had dated Connie first, she’d broken up with him.

“I didn’t think it was fair.” She explained one night, while Maine diced tomatoes. “I had a count and sooner or later, you were going to come along. I just wanted to spare him, not that it mattered in the end.” It hadn’t. It really, really hadn’t. Washington had been dating Maine when Connie had shown up to check on her ex...and Maine had answered the door.

The soft “Oh.” Wash had muttered when their counts had hit zero in front of him haunts Maine now.

Maine isn’t sure he can talk to Wash directly anymore. Doesn’t want to break anything further then it already is. So, he checks in with their other mutual friends. Feels the situation out so to speak.

“Oh hey Maine. Congrats on finding Connie. Yeah. No. He’s...okay now. Okayish. Maybe?” York doesn’t have a lot of information on Washington’s current condition. “He doesn’t really hang out with me and Carolina anymore. It’s driving her a little up the wall. North’s his go to guy right now. Check in with him. Oh and Maine? Let us know how he’s doing, kay?”

It made sense, Wash coming out of a three year relationship broken up by a soulmate bond, wouldn’t want to hang around other soulmate pairs. York was never far from Carolina, but North was much more relaxed.

(It probably helped that he’d been born with his soulmate.)

“Maine, how’s it going buddy?” Talking with North always put Maine a little on edge. “Wash? He was a mess for a bit, not gonna lie. But I think the complete break helped, he’s been on an even keel for a couple months now. Nah, he hasn’t been dating. I think he’s given up on that. Had to fight off a guy just the other night. Dude took no countdown to mean ‘open for business’.” Maine has to remind himself to stop his hands from clenching too hard. He can’t keep replacing phones. “Anyway I think...I think it’d be okay if you wanted to talk to him. He hasn’t deleted your number.”

The news is good, the best even, better then Maine had hoped. Except he doesn’t know what to say to Wash.

Maine calls, once a day, every day. He can‘t make his mouth say any words, ask any questions, explains things, the best he manages is a grumble growl. Wash is confused the first time, but by the second call, he’s figured it out, figured  _ Maine _ out.

“I’m doing okay. No hard feelings Maine. I’m... _ happy _ you found Connie. Glad I could help.” There’s something Washington isn’t saying. Something in between the words and the tone and Maine  _ hopes _ it’s what he thinks it is. Connie hasn’t fully gotten over Wash, despite being the one to break up with him and Maine  _ knows _ he for sure isn’t.

There’s something about Washington. How he’s  _ whole  _ in ways they aren’t but broken all the same for it. They  _ chose _ Wash, and he chose them. Separately. Maine hopes he'll choose them together.  


 

“I miss him too.” Connie says into his chest one night. A week after Maine’s managed to re initiate contact with Washington. “I know you do, and I’ve been missing him for long time. I think...I think we could make it work. I  _ want  _ it to work.” In this, like all things, they agree. They both want Washington. That’s one layer of the problem solved.

Getting Washington is a whole other layer though.

Maine is at least partly sure and Connie is ninety nine point nine percent certain, that Washington would be at the very least open to the idea. It’s all in how they approach him.

“We’re going to have to wait.” Connie’s teeth snap a baby carrot in half and she speaks through the bright orange mush. “He’s not too sure of himself right now, we don’t want to scare him off or force him into a relationship he might resent. We wait until he’s ready.” Maine sighs, but agrees. 

It hurts waiting for Washington. The black hole remains, he’ll find himself turning to hand something to Wash, or flicking to the news station that Wash liked in the mornings or even just feeling the empty space at his back when in bed.

When Wash starts hanging out with York and Carolina again, they start seriously making plans.

“We can’t be too subtle about it, you know he doesn’t catch subtlety but we also can’t come right out and say it either. He’s always been edgy.” 

When Wash starts calling them on his own, starts inviting them separately places with him and the others, Maine looks into the logistics and prices of getting a bigger bed. Connie moves their clothes around in the closets and dressers, making space where there wasn’t. Maine thinks they’re being ridiculously optimistic about it. 

“You want this, I want this.” She tells him, refolding the towels in their linen closet. “If he doesn’t want this…” She trails off. “We’ll deal with that when the time comes.” She finishes decisively, patting the folded towels into place.

 

The rooftop party is the first time both Maine and Connie are in the same vicinity as Washington. Wash had arrived before them, and looked pleasantly buzzed as he leaned against the railing, sliding down to sit with his legs dangling over the edge. Connie raises her eyebrows up at Maine.

Not tonight then. They’ll wait until Wash is sober before approaching him.

That was the plan anyway, up until York slides between the two of them, trying valiantly to throw his arms over both Maine and Connie’s shoulders. He didn’t quite manage, Maine being at least four feet taller then Connie, but also didn’t seem to care.

“So word on the street is you’re looking to turn your duet into a trio.” He waggled his eyebrows and Maine has to stifle the urge cover York’s face with his hand and  _ push _ .

“Word on the street?” Connie’s voice is sharp, suspicious, York only laughs.

“Don’t worry, don’t worry. When Carolina was over your place she noticed you making  _ room _ . No one’s told him...yet.” Maine rumbles in his chest, shifting on his feet. “ _ We _ think,” York emphasis on ‘we’ leads Maine to conclude he’s talking about more people then just himself and Carolina. “That you should go for it. Wash deserves to be happy, for all the shit he’s been through and you guys made him happy. And really sad, but mostly happy. Figure the odds of him being happy are increased if you team up...also the odds of him being really sad.”

“Why thank you, York.” Sarcasm is a skill Connie mastered long ago. York is drunk enough not to care.

“But that’s a risk we’re willing to take.” York plowed on as though Connie hadn’t spoken. “We all agreed, you should go for it. Like, right now.”

“ _ Now?  _ But he’s-”

“No excuses.” York cuts through Connie’s objections and attempts to push them toward Washington. It works with Connie, she stumbles a few feet forward. It fails spectacularly with Maine, ending with Maine having not moved even an inch and York flat out on his back, having somehow lost his balance. Maine isn’t quite sure what to do with this turn of events. Thankfully Carolina is not anywhere near as inebriated as her partner.

“Okay York, time to get up.” She stands over him with her hands on hips, ignoring York’s muffled groaning and Maine leaves her to it. Catches up to Connie, who is  _ sticking her tongue down Wash’s throat _ . God _ damnit _ . What happened to being subtle?!

And promptly forgets that when he sits down and Wash breaks away from Connie to stutter at him, eyes wide and full of guilt, with a tiny hint of fear. Wash shouldn’t look at him like that, shouldn’t ever have to be scared of Maine.

His lips are on Wash’s before he even knows what he’s doing.

Oh.

Wash’s mouth opens, his now empty hand grips Maine’s arm. (Maine completely disregards York’s strangled yelp as Wash’s beer bottle makes friends with York’s car.) Wash hadn’t moved on. He’d just gotten better at dealing.

_ Oh _ .

Maine missed Washington.  _ Missed _ him.

The second realization is that he would do  _ anything _ if it meant Wash would choose them. And he’s okay with that too.

He feels like his stomach followed Washington’s dropped beer bottle to smash on a car roof when Wash agrees to try.

When Washington chooses them in return.

 

“How long were you guys planning this?” Wash asks six months later, on moving in and noticing all the space made just for him. All the care they took to create a space for him in their life. Connie grins unrepentant.

“A girl never tells her secrets.” Maine only shakes his head when Wash turns to him.

“I’m onto you two.” He mutters, stuffing his pants into a dresser drawer next to Maine's sweatshirts while Connie hangs his work shirts in their closet. Maine laughs.

It was a complicated problem, figuring out he was in love outside his soulmate, it was a long wait solution with a lot of risk attached if they failed.

But it was worth it.


End file.
